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Bliss in a hot tub!

In 2009, my three children, husband and I went on our last family holiday together. We chose to stay with a new company that had recently opened called Forest Holidays. They own and run wooden cabins set in some of the most beautiful and tranquil areas of Great Britain. Despite it being a long journey, we chose to stay at Strathyre, nestled in the Trossachs right next to Loch Lubnaig.

Having to choose the cheaper time of the year, we stayed at the beginning of December. A cold snap had descended upon Scotland, and whilst we got nearer and nearer to our destination, we were gifted stunning views of snow speckled fields and mountains, giving us a glimpse of what we hoped we would experience on our trip. Arriving at approximately 3pm, we were dumbfounded to be met with mud and grit, but no snow.

Booking in was easy, the staff were well organised, sending us off to our designated cabin for the next 4 nights.

Getting our first look of our temporary home took our breath away. As soon as you opened the door we were met with an open plan lounge/kitchen, the latter was fully equipped with a dishwasher and all the cooking equipment you could ever need. The ground floor was finished off with a main bathroom, which contained a shower, and tiled from floor to ceiling. A twin room, which became my sons home away from home, was idealistic for him as he was on a complete different floor to his sisters!

On the first floor was another twin room, with a stylised little cubby to the rear of the room, that my daughters turned into a reading and media room, taking their iPods and phones with them to stay tucked away from the rest of the party.

The master bedroom had a king size bed, with an en suite bathroom, containing a freestanding rolltop bath. The views from the window were glorious.

The icing on the cake was both the wood burning fire which faced out the full height glass opening doors in the lounge, and the hot tub which was on the decking just outside the lounge exit.

Day 1 wore us out with all its travelling, we took the chance to get a good nights sleep and all turned in, after a mad panic trying to locate all the things the kids just had to have to make their sleep peaceful.

I was awoken by my husband on day 2 telling me to look out the window, in a very animated way (not ideal as he was naked!), I crawled out of bed to find a 3 inch covering of snow that fell over night. The whole area was so beautiful! Mist was hanging over the mountains that were across the Loch, and a little robin came and stood on the fencing around our decked area, just seemingly saying hello.

As you can imagine, three children and newly laid snow went like strawberries and cream! A match made in heaven, so breakfast was shovelled down, clothes speedily donned, and snowball fights instigated!

After 20 minutes of avoiding being pelted to death, plans were made as to what to do on our first full day. As the snow was quite thick, we decided to explore Ben Ledi, a mountain not too far from the site.

Huge conifers and bracken covered in snow, streams frozen solid, wildlife running madly trying to locate food, these were all things seen whilst we trekked up the mountain, only managing half way before the worn out adult bodies gave in and had to slow down the youthful romp who wanted to go ever higher!

After all the rigmarole of dinners and bed, three tuckered out kids all fast asleep in their respective rooms, my husband and I thought we’d try out the hot tub. It was the most glorious thing on Gods green earth! If you have had the pleasure of a hot tub before, you might know the feeling that your way too hot on the outside to continue sitting and soaking. Turns out December is the ultimate time of year for a tub! With your bottom half languishing in warm water and your top half being blasted with frozen air, it is such a joy that I could of happily stayed there for the next 3 days!


Snapchat – solely for filters!

I, like most other ‘older’ people, discovered Snapchat for their filters! Any way of making me look less haggard and tired is appreciated!

Having hit a drought lately, I seem to be of no interest to the general public 😢 I understand, most of my posts are either moaning about my various and oh so many medical complaints, or moaning about my pain in the butt husband and his oh so many complaints (not medical, just about everything that exists!). So, as of today, I am going to try and bury the b.i.t.c.h. and try and reintroduce the ‘happy go lucky’ human bean I used to be!

To enable me to do this, I took a couple of photos today with the good ole filters! They do a miraculous job!!

Here ya go:

Please excuse the bra! This flaming top has a habit of going south when you least want it to and, to be honest, I couldn’t be arsed to crop the photos! 😂😂

Any nice comments, please post! Any horrid comments, please keep to yourself, as you know your Mum told you ‘if you cannot say anything nice, say nothing at all’!

Love, Nikki ❤️❤️

I Will Not Apologise!

I will not apologise for being me! I am stubborn, organised, easily bored and alienated from my entire family.

They say to make a list of your good and bad sides, for me to do that would take an eternity! It would be extremely side heavy towards bad sides, but that’s because I never have anyone telling me about my good sides, everyone loves to point out your flaws, they would all pretty much queue round the block to tell me what is bad, the good sides don’t exist anymore.

I took a ‘God’s honest truth’ selfie today. Messy hair, only a top on, and thought I would post it on the usual social network platforms and see what reaction I would get. Nothing. Not a damn thing! So, butt ugly has been confirmed. Obese, yes, doctors have told me time and time again that is the case, but with my formally diagnosed conditions, exercise is not easy. I spend money I don’t have, because of this I have in excess of £5,000 debt. I pick my fingers, toes, heels, spots and skin defects until I bleed. I probably dwell on things too much. I always want what I can’t have.

My entire family is no longer speaking to me because of a decision I made 8 years ago, and then because of another 4 years ago. I don’t want this to be the case, but I can’t change a thing unless I make a huge life altering decision, upset the status quo entirely. I am not sure I can do that.

Oh, here’s the photo:

Outside These Four Walls

Well, the time has come! I am stepping foot outside my house on Friday 13th!

I sort of have to, as we’re going to see The Muppets Take The O2 at the O2 Arena, thoroughly looking forward to it, lots of added guests have been invited (by Kermit, obviously, not me!), I bought shoes to commemorate the event!

I’ll let you know how it goes! Also how many times my husband complains about our seating, the state of health of all the other audience members and how much his arse hurts! I shall mention how uncovered and uncomfortable my new dress is that I bought for the occasion!

N.B. I’ll probably end up wearing jeans!

It’s coming home!

The F1 Championship, again! Not that poxy football thing!! I really can’t stand football, almost as much as I tolerate Formula 1! The only reason is because this man is attending:Jenson Alexander Lyons Button, 2009 F1 World Champion, and signer of my arm:and subsequent tattoo adorning my arm! Obsessed much?, me??! Noooooooo!!!LGBTQ+ is taking over the Country this weekend, Saturday specifically, along the memorial for the 52 victims of 7/7. These things need to be remembered and taken notice of, not just because overpaid players manage to get a ball in a net!See you next fortnight ❤️

Think, think, think!

I was laying here, once again, wondering why I cannot sleep, and a thought popped in my head. The thought was quite profound for 2.50am, ‘am I ungrateful?’ – I fear the answer might be yes.

Whilst trawling through a timeline filled with Trump (extremely unpleasant!), I read report upon report about the poor children being separated from their parents, and how the Executive Order the great orange one put in place today will only help new ‘inmates’, not current ones, so there will still be thousands of children without their primary caregivers. It’s unforgivable and heartbreaking.

A lot of these families are escaping torment, they want to make a new and better life for the future, as long as they fall within the guidelines, why should they be stopped? In decades past there were no customs or border control, people came and went as they liked, yes, sometimes unscrupulous countries decided they were better than everybody else, and set up camp, ostracised the indigenous people, and called it home, but there was free transit across the globe.

Nowadays we are cordoned off, people that need to escape war and famine are made to jump through hoops to have a safe home, yes, we need to be vigilant for the small minorities that are trying to do us harm, but on the whole, people just want safety.

We are all fundamentally the same. Brain, skeleton, muscle and tendons, our skin colour may be different, our languages may vary wildly, but we are all homosapiens, looking for our camp fire and cave. Most of the 60+ year old generation seem to find it in Spain, what would happen if they were all kicked out? Apart from an influx of old, brown, leathery skinned wrinkly people, Spain would lose a lot of their economy, as it is kept buoyant by the old wrinkly folk, as is our economy, by all the incoming people from other nations.

Back to my pondering. I have a home. I have a husband. I have transport. I have accumulated all the contents of my home over the last 17 years, I do not want for anything really. I am well fed (yes, FAT!), I have illnesses that restrict what I can do in a day, but that is a small price to pay. There are hundreds of thousands of people out there that are nowhere near as lucky as I am. Why am I complaining?!!!

I think I need to realise how much I do have, and not whinge about what are actually, quite petty things in the large picture.

Hummm. Think, think, think.

Fathers Day

Fathers Day has become a joke in my house! I send my Dad a card every year, even though we haven’t spoken for the last 4 years, because I upset my Mum, she controls the house, so we have had no contact since I got back with my husband 4 years ago, as she stated at the time “I don’t suffer fools gladly”.

Both my Grandfathers have passed, one when I was two, the other when I was eight, so I have nobody there to thanks.

I took the vow this year to let my husband deal with the celebrations for his side of the family, hence his Mum was upset over her lack of effort on her birthday. Fathers Day continued along the same theme, no card was sent, even though his Dad has just battled bowel cancer and thankfully won. I asked if he wanted me to send a text, his reply was ‘no, don’t bother, I don’t care’.

My husband has two daughters, one who is 23, the other is 20. We moved 10 years ago to be nearer the eldest, despite many efforts things have not got better between them, so nothing received from her, as far as I know. The youngest he stopped seeing 17 years ago, I don’t even know if she knows who her Dad is! So that’s that.

All in all, Fathers Day is a bust, just like every other day of celebration. Roll on Hallowe’en!!

Blogging All Over The World

Arse about face!

This is not my latest sexual position!, or the fact that most days I look like I have an arse for a face, it is about this photo:

Please ignore the cleavage and the triple chins hiding therein, it’s more about the human contained within the skin and bones pretending to be a body!

I feel as bad as I look, believe me, hence the title for this post. My poor excuse for a skeleton is being a tosspot! My insomnia is completely out of hand, 5am seems to be the average time I fall asleep, with the other tosspot skeleton waking me up at 10.00am! (yes, my husband!). I look like a panda, but with less fur and no cuteness appeal!, if I did ten rounds with David Haye I’d come out looking better!

Then there’s the mental health. Depression? Tick, Unhealthy relationship with food? Tick, Explosive temper? Tick! The depression is kept on an even keel by medication, until the temper kicks in brought on by PMT, then all hell breaks loose, after 17 years you’d think he’d have cottoned onto ‘once a month’, but it always seems to bewilder him! Just because I am hollowed out like a coconut it does not mean I don’t suffer with PMT! Bloody man!! The food relationship has always been an issue! My Dads side of the family are all 5ft 3 and rotund. I, on the other hand, am 5ft 6, but have inherited the ferocious appetite, the hollow legs, and the inability to stop eating! I am 18 stone last time I weighed myself, and every month it’s heading upwards. I know I need to curb it, but how?! exercise isn’t going to happen with my fibromyalgia, so what else can I do? Mmmm, that brownie looks yummy! Be right back!

Sorry! Crumbs on the screen. So, you find me here, 2.19am, laying in bed, under duvet, fan blowing away to stop me dissolving into a puddle of sweat. I am contemplating what to do till 5am. I shall flit between Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, watching friends and acquaintances living their lives, whilst I live vicariously through them. If you want to chat, find me there.

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I was reading the wonderful Kat Von D’s post on Instagram earlier today, she was recently married to her soulmate, and they are expecting their first child together. Congratulations from me, as a Mum of 3, to a soon to be new Mum of one. That is the scariest place in the world, this bundle you have loved and kept safe and warm for 9 months, is placed in your arms, then off you go, care for this crying, windy, poopy monster, and make it out alive and sane in 18 years time.

When she first announced she was pregnant, she said that the baby would be brought up vegan, and that vaccinations would be considered at the appropriate times. Now, much has been highlighted in the press about children becoming ill after a vaccine, so it is not a decision to be taken lightly, everything must be researched by the parents, and the answer that is right for them will be taken.

This is what is upsetting and annoying me. The parents are the only two people on this planet that can say what is right for their child. God forbid, if something goes wrong, they will be the people that have to live with those decisions for the rest of their lives. I am sure they appreciate a small amount of information from well meaning friends and family.

People who listen to their music, watch their programmes or buy their products are entitled to their own opinion, but to force that opinion onto them, to say spiteful and nasty things to them, or to wish harm to their unborn child is unacceptable!

I was brought up with the old adage ‘If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all’ ringing in my ears, behind closed doors says and think what you like, but social media is not there to impart your wisdom onto someone who never asked for it in the first place!

Once again, congratulations Kat & Rafael, and I look so forward to meeting little Leafar when he arrives 🖤